You can take a woman out of the abusive environment but it won’t take the abused mentality out of the woman. That might seem like a pretty harsh statement, but it is nevertheless true.

How many times have we seen abused women return to live with their abuser?  How many times have women who have escaped an abusive relationship, go into another one?
 

Woman Being Physically Abused

As a registered nurse and stress relief coach, a large number of my clients either are in or have been in abusive relationships.  In almost every case, when I review their history, there has been abuse of some form in their childhood.

Abuse takes many forms.  It can be sexual, physical, verbal or emotional.  The results are usually the same.  The child grows up believing that they have no worth and that they deserve to be abused. 

After all, to children, their parents are God.  If “God” thinks that they deserve to be treated badly, then it must be true.  Also, children have no options.  They are not mature enough to realize they have any rights; let alone stand up for them.  Children think that the way they live must be the way that everyone lives.

This negative conditioning is usually created before the child reaches the age of understanding.  Sometimes they will have no memory of the abuse because the subconscious (or below conscious awareness) mind buries memories that are too emotionally painful.

But the results are obvious.  This negative emotional conditioning creates a belief system that they are not good enough and deserve to be abused. That is why women stay in abusive relationships – and why outside intervention often does not work.  They have to be true to their belief system.

The only way the abuse cycle can be stopped is to break the negative conditioning that makes up the woman’s belief system that she deserves to be treated badly.  It is an inside job. 

 The most effective tool I have found for breaking these negative belief systems is Emotional Freedom Technique or EFT.   EFT is able to get down to the subconscious core abuse conditioning and eliminate them. 

Once these negative belief systems are broken, the woman will know that she deserves to be treated better and will no longer tolerate the abuse.  She will become stronger and able to form healthy relationships.

For information on how to break negative emotional conditioning, go  to www.SherylStanton.com  or email stressrelief@shaw.ca